Its ok relax. i can tell ur gonna start raggin. talk 2 u next week
I'm not really sure actually. until I fell in love with a boy (which was just a few weeks ago) I thought my attraction to men was purely physical.
so you were gay...and then you realized you were EVEN MORE gay
So we were in the middle of hooking up when he stopped me. I thought he was having a moral dilemma about the whole having a girlfriend thing. But no. He got down on all fours, butt naked, and started throwing up and farting simultaneously. I took it as my cue to leave.
The only pictures he has from one of the biggest football weekends is an album titled "I miss my dog" filled with tons of pictures of his dog and him. This relationship must end.
So we are lighting beer bottles on fire and breaking them in half to make glasses
That sounds dangerous
Don't worry......were wearing oven mits.
You insisted on take shots off of plates.
I'm in charge of his party but you're a paramedic, we're both needed.
I lull them into a false sense of security with my gayness. Then when they're vulnerable, I strike, like a snake. A big non-gay snake, with huge balls.
We knew we were dealing with a pro when some random guy at the bar thew you over his shoulder and you still didn't spill your drink
Strangely enough, that's not the first time that's happened
I just want my paycheck, and my friends. And alcohol and tacos. Is that so much to ask?
I tried to light my cup as a bong. I'm done drinking
We had to push you home in an abandoned shopping trolley. You thought you were in a pirate boat and kept yelling "AVAST, ME HEARTIES".
I honestly didn't think living in Canada would change me, until I found myself watching hockey porn
I had sex upstairs in my parents house, and my mom texted me and said "those raccoons are out of control in the walls."
He went down on me while I was on the phone with my grandma.
Randomize
