How's tricks little girl?
Trix are for kids, old man.
What's your middle initial? I need it for the census. I put us down as "unmarried partners."
Oh my god... you're gay. Ps, its A.
No no. According to the 2010 US Census, we're gay.
is he apposed to sex in general? or just porch sex?
I told him he was my first gentile. He was so flattered.
Because its an amazing idea and you're the only one I can think of that will allow a pirate threesome
Just slept with my boyfriend's roomie to learn if bf was cheating on me
Good plan. When in doubt, sleep about.
Have invented new cocktail. Any flavor of crystal light and vodka. I call it "I am going to die alone"
Oh you know, we just bobbed for apples in a bucket full of jungle juice. So, a casual Tuesday night.
Topenga is going to be back on TV. Finally my fantasy of her being a milf in junior high has come full circle.
Though my hair looks fantastic i will unfortunately have to turn down your 4am sex offer
Dude just bought the table 3 bottles of champaign and broke one on the floor as his "signature" and he makes me want this recession hit harder
Thanks for being my pregnancy scare Sherpa...
I haven't included my nuts in a shave since the Shaq/kobe Lakers era. I gave my self the ol full court press in order to change the tempo.
I always knew I would be boring and die in an Uber.
Currently eating a pop tart in my underwear waiting for the washer. Not one of my prouder moments.
Randomize
