I don't care how old I am, if it's your 21st birthday I'm going to make out with you.
I've been very busy/drunk lately... Sorry.
The way I'm gonna look at it is, if you don't makeout with your roommate once in college, you didn't do something right.
Carving a pumpkin in a gay bar at 2am. How did my life get to be this way.
Hmmm. I never knew the difference. I've done either one and had stronger or weaker versions but usually if i took enough, i tripped balls. That should be a PSA for kids... if you take drugs and the drugs are weak, just take more drugs... The More You Know
Shitty. Well if it makes you feel any better I just had a toothless wasted crackhead in my bar who was mad because there are TOO MANY FUCKIN TREES in Nantucket.
It's a little sad/awesome that I scored coke within 60 seconds of walking in the bar.
The student becomes the teacher.
We dug deep emotionally while eating cereal
No more weed for you
Back. Waiting on Thong the shuttle bus driver. THONG
his first act of 2015 was getting stabbed
I need a drink. No, several. I need several drinks. Drunk, I need to be drunk. Definitely need to be drunk
And for today's main disappontment. I thought I saw a midget with fireworks get on the buss, alas it's a child with cleaning supplies
Hey, I'm just seeing how you're doing and letting you know I fucked your dad last night. Don't fuck with me.
so he's a sleeptalker.
yeah??
"Mitochondria is the powerhouse of the cell" right in my ear. 2 am.
It's official. My little brother has had more sex in my car than I have. I'm still tied with my little sister. I hate everybody.
Randomize
