Weren't you self-described as an 'arab' slut?
No?
Well my cheeks are red now
Her life has all the ingredients for a how to book: Making Your Life an Epic Fail
He kept asking me to take off my bra and I sat up so he could. He fumbled with it for a few minutes and when I sighed and went to undo it he goes, "Yeah, you got this."
its barely noon and he already threw up and i have second degree burn
I passed out on my porch last night. I'm still making it to class. This is what growing up means.
How does one fall all the way up a flight of stairs? Its hard on me knowing that the survival of our species depends on me not reproducing.
They're pole dancing on a handicap sign post.
Cops are just so fun an beautifuk
Call me something sexy & ethnic. Like jasmine. But mystical too. Like Mermaid Jasmine. And throw Glitter somewhere in there too.
It blows my mind that pandora doesn't have an : I want to lay in bed in the dark and be sad and cold and eat frozen mangos and chipotle all day station
Just when I decided to go get a taco and a blunt cake it starts raining. Coincidence? or divine intervention?
You were making out w/ur brothers coach against a door when someone opened it and you both fell through... Then you continued to make out on the ground
You casually put your finger in my ass and other people are weird..
On a scale of "huh, that's interesting" to "holy porn stars, batman". How good?
Definitely closer to "holy porn stars, batman".
I want to conceive our bastard child on an athletic field. Why can't we make this happen?
Randomize