they started playing Don't Stop Believin' and you had a melt down because it wasnt the Glee version
dressing as green man for st patrick's day = free drinks all night long
omg. he's a virgin strip club employee who's going to college on a ping pong scholarship. this is unreal.
She called herself a train and then took off all her clothing. I forget everything after that.
I saw you two flinging Jello at the sidewalk if that helps jog your memory.
Yea.. I remember nothing. Except that the taxi driver was 56 years old and apparently never cheated on his wife.
hey did i steal that bike before or after the ball dropped, casue i might have broken my resolution already
Someone just proposed in Subway. Trying not to laugh.
Lame. Party is tapping out at 4am. Even chanting "USA" didn't rally them.
Thanks for having me and my emotional baggage over last night.
So is it safe to say that my only objective from last night is to finish this entire jar of peanut butter?
He wouldn't stop calling me so I sent him a text saying "I'm dead. Dead. Leave me alone." And he replied with "so can I see you then?"
It is a bad day indeed when you learn that your boy toy looks better in your dresses than you do
He was telling me about how he's leaving on his Mission next week... While we were having sex in the back of his car.
I miss your drunken presence, and strong odor of hard liquor and potent weed.
Last night’s booty call turned into a cuddlefest. Get your game face on, we’re hunting dick tonight
Randomize
