she just sneezed while going down on me. is it rude for me to ask her to do it again?
sunday morning discovery: something purple, smelly, and sticky my hair. any suggestions?
I literally just saw a campus policeman riding a Segway pull over a moving car. you should just give up.
Why did you put hummus in my pillow case?
The trip involved octopus tentacles coming from the little holes in my TV's speakers. The beauty of the nonexistant symbolism had me in tears.
Apparently the cops have a video of me singing bob seger "Night moves".
Even the bar was yelling boobs, so of course the shirt came off
Code red. She won't talk to me. Maybe it has something to do with her raccoon eyes. Perry said there was a brief moment of towel fighting until you passed out. Did you draw the turtle on my ass?
I'm not entirely sure what we did is legal in the U.S., but I know that couple wont be the same
it went ok. then he slept in a parking lot and took me out for a picnic the next day. boys are confusing.
These girls just walked into this party as reverse cowgirls... Wearing cowboy clothes all backwards
Puke-y regrets or just things-seem-far-away regrets?
You thought her boot was a stray dog in your house..
I hate csi yet I find myself watching a full marathon. I am also eating hotdog buns stuffed with barbecue chips and they are quite tasty
I woke up with my converse still on and a plate of pasta next to my face, if that gives you any indication of how my night went
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