If I remember correctly, I may have been smoking a cigarette on the dance floor. This is the true sign of a douchebag in his native habitat...fmylife
Too bad my picture didn't come thru. It was one of me naked riding a unicorn with a wizard hat and a magic staff. And the unicorn had wings. And me too.
i'm drinking out of my 'black like my president' mug
What kind of soap washes out shame, bad decisions, and whiskey?
Irish Spring?
I'm the only adult here not drinking and their 2 year old daughter is trying to play dolls with me.. I've never been so demoralized in my life.
I was naked with an australian flag taped to my boobs. Damn internationals think they can claim everything.
Those people having sex on the beach kept looking over at you guys throwing his shoes at the seagulls.
making out was so insane. it felt like our tongues were paintbrushes made of waves and we were painting an ocean galazy
its not you its me. and by that i mean i am more interested in having random one night stands with random hot girls then having the same normal sex with u.
I'll pretend I don't know she's blind, my morals claimed the back seat in this adventure.
I talked to the pizza guy for 10 minutes about my truck, I don't even have a truck
The difference between 22 and 28 is bigger than I realised. I had the urge to put on Spongebob and give him a cookie.
Fyi - we're going to be eating those sandwiches in bed when you get home.
Well supposedly when the cops came, they say I tried to get them in a conga line like Jim Carrey in The Mask. So....yea
We're about to get drunk and it feels wrong without you
Randomize
