Sandwiches eeeeeeverywhere.
I made out with four boys last night, AND EXCUSE ME WHILE I COUNT HOW MANY GIRLS.
see you put your penis in her and it's like an ignition key to start the crazy
I like daylight savings. I don't care if it's 4 oclock it's not daydrinking if it's dark out
seek help.
You got ahold of his prescription papers and gave out prescriptions for cranberry and vodka
They upped the price of Plan B! Rite-aid is going to be the reason I have illegitimate kids.
She told me to stuff her like a turkey. She actually yelled happy thanksgiving.
I only remembered where urgent care was because it's across the street from my favorite bar
I slept with him because his girlfriend should know better than to be with him given is reputation. It was like sex and a lesson all in one.
Just made out with a girl I dated in high school, and she told me her girlfriend likes me. I like where this is going.
We didn't want to make a pit stop so I just helped my husband pee in a bottle. No one told me this was part of love.
Going to the u of w I constantly have that moment of, oh hey I felt you up at that rave at folk fest that one time. Winnipeg is too small.
She had her pubic hair down there shaved into the superman s............. Best one night stand ever.
Like I could never be a lawyer because I would just look like a porn star impersonation of a lawyer.
He asked when the last time I had sex was. I had to look at the clock and respond "12 hours ago"
Randomize