hook me up with the drugs dog keep up the good work
I just washed champagne and tuna off my body. I feel like that was a successful shower.
Haha so I huess that means he's a little over 7. I can use my throat as a ruler!!
One less school supply you need to buy!!
i'm going to look back at this as the time of my life when i casually dated that autistic guy
I elbow dropped a bag of ice to break it so we could make margaritas. I bled everywhere. Be proud.
looking at that huge scar on my leg from when i got drunk at 9 AM and walked into a grill. so excited for football season to start again!
Good point, clearly my love of penis contributed to my torn knee ligament.
Okay. So my choices are the sleeping Guy who looks about twelve and a man that looks like he was the original sandman. Im gonna need a beer for this......
He woke up in a dragon costume, covered in bong water. That was a party we will regret missing.
I can measure my amount of vomit in solo cups.
Kellie accidentally ran into the car with two teenagers making out. made a big thud. there was a loud scream and she was gone...haven't seen her since
Definitely ended up doing Coke with Chewbacca in the porta potty behind the haunted house.
I walked in on him fucking her whilst she ate skittles. I saw things no one should see, but I did get your bra back. You owe me.
We all love a big dick, but you’re going to develop a reputation if you keep asking every guy at the bar ‘how big your dick’
That’s all I’m saying
Wow first he impregnates you then he won't send you the sex tape you made together? Where has chivalry gone?
Randomize
