Dating is not our generation's strong point. We're an era that's good at getting laid.
I think I have swimmer's ear. From his tongue.
I'm in the dining hall. that same guy is here again, the one who sits alone and talks to his silverware.
dude just did a line with screech. dude is fucking creepy
im calling her cock vulture from now on
I'm spooning a three legged dog right now. Started drinking whiskey with Breakfast. Best part about being biracial is Irish cousins. Dog Pic Attahed
A man pulled out his penis last night and when I said I wouldn't touch it, he said, "that's fine it just needs to breathe".
i still can't believe we survived that barcrawl. the third bar had bullet holes and we still went in.
He just told me the blow job I gave him was like a journey
the chips you spilled whiskey on is not the same thing as Irish breakfast potatoes
I'm all for hockey players but dude, he asked me to lick his chipped tooth mid-hook up.
I need something for rope burns and an inner ear infection. Separate incidents, FYI..
She was doing hand motions and used straws from drinks like those airport light batons to have me back my "747 jumbo dick" towards you.
Girl you're stalking so hard you're gonna know both their social security numbers soon
If you dont get laid dressed as Woody Harrelson in Zombieland, I have lost all faith in the men of nw Indiana.
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