He's gotten way too comfortable around me. He came into the bathroom and took a shit while I was in the shower.
his personality makes his face look like an asshole.
I almost got runover on the sidewalk by a car but wen it got closer it was a crackhead walking with the whole front of a car... bumper, lights and all... I love New York.
no ping pong balls so we're playing beer pong with an ornament. you can't tell me that's not festive.
He tried to bang a 300 pounder last night. No joke. I shotgunned a tall boy in a bar cuz the bartender didn't crack the beer. Cant wait till Nashville.
I mean, I know going to rehab probably didn't make her a lesbian, but I can always hope
dude, i woke up with a mini keg on my night stand. again. like wtf
I think if it were a part of everyone's daily routine, the world would be happier. International Finger Yourself While Bathing Day.
Hey history final, how's it feel to be raped in the ass by my steel cock of ACADEMIC PERFECTION?
you are way too vulgar to be a girl
now that I know that you did coke with your mom I can't look at her the same
DONT LET HIM GET NAKED. JUST SAY NO
I saw your relationship status and wanted to write "Now you can fuck with some peace of mind that she isn't giving that other guy she met online a handjob."
Awkward sister question: which game of thrones female left would you fuck?
Maybe snorting K off penises isn't healthy
Listen, she cheated on him first. I've known both of them since we were 12. They have no secrets from me. And yes, as a matter of fact, I absolutely did enjoy screaming out his name into his, soon to be, ex wife's pillow.
Randomize
