redhead is getting on the bull...again red head is getting on the bull!
WTF?! TAYLOR SWIFT JUST WON ARTIST OF THE YEAR OVER MICHAEL JACKSON?! WHAT IS THIS WORLD COMING TO?!
Just shaved my vagina. It's been so long I forgot what it looked like. You need to come over right now.
Also I got A jello shot for $2!!! It's like the forever 21 of bars
look. either you want to have late night naked sleep overs or you don't. do not involve dinner and extraneous conversations in this relationship.
She made me cum so hard I couldn't hear for half an hour after
When a bartender remarks "wow" on how quickly you've finished a drink... Is that good or bad?
"Just cut me in half. Then take half of me home. And leave the other half here. Cuz I can't see."
Nothing says Panama City like condoms washing up on the shore.
You sent me a naked picture of you as a child? How is that normal
It's ok, it's locked within patented Sealrite technology. That puke is staying fresh
I felt like I was selling my soul to satan but then I realized I already pawned it for drug money
Your cousin just directly asked you for nudes
I did something very bad. More specifically, my boss.
A drunk frat boy just jumped on the hood of my car while I was driving down Bridge St. He yelled at me to keep going since he was playing frogger and needed another car to jump on... or a log. I hate this town.
Randomize
