woke up this morning wit a massive hangover. walked to my truck and found at least 35 for sale signs, a stop sign, and a julie kim sign...need answers
yea, you decided to become a real estate agent last night on the way home from the party. You started bitchin about how Julie Kim was stealing all your buisness....
so i was pissing and the phone rang but i forgot i was pissing so i just ran to answer the phone. it was too late when i realized
I told him I had my daily dose of vitamin c so i wouldn't blow him
well I mean we knew we had more drinkers than runners, so we had a "case race for the cure" for relay for life instead of an actual marathon. day drinking and philanthropy. can't go wrong.
We'll probably be arrested for having a cheetah in our apartment anyway, so I say go for it.
Your scrotum should have touched every square inch of that place by now. Start with the water fountain.
Btw sorry for throwing that bag of ice at your face lastnight....
i just shaved my vag. i figure it gave me about ten more minutes to drink tomorrow.
I'm on a mission. But just to make out with him so his relationship collapses and he is single when I come back in April.
We team puked and then made sex like wild monkeys. If that isn't love, I don't know what is.
She literally just changed his birthday. Overly attached girlfriend has nothing on her.
That's like.....u just dangled a sex carrot in front of me then took it away!
I hope you gays don't get too crazy after DOMA. Gay divorces aren't any better than straight ones.
How bad would it be to ask my maintenance man for new blinds because the dude puked on those too?
We should leave before they realize I dumped a bowl of Fritos in your bag just in case I got hungry
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