Shit chicky whatchu wearin rt now, ur skins?
Oh dear, kinda... in ur sweats!
U look good, r we getting naked in ur car?
She said she could kiss it, just not put it in her mouth. Because that would be cheating..
do you remember putting condoms over both your hands and asking me if your fists would be too big.
Just watched a porn with the dvd commentary on i think i need to re-evaluate my life
I have your camera. You have 35 naked pictures of me. you're welcome.
today i did the best job ever shaving. like my vagina is PERFECT. plus i straightened my hair for a good hour. if i don't get ass tonight, i'm killing a baby.
Dude, we somehow need to leave discretely with the toilet brush.
I have absolutely nothing sober to say to you.
Only sluts go out in this weather carpe diem boys
I didn't realize how trashy of a night we had.
Welllll, you did eat a cherry out of my pussy. So I think that classes it up a little.
I had to rename my dildo. I met a little kid who named his teddy bear the same name. It just felt wrong.
I wrote an entire paper in under an hour about The Nightmare Before Christmas. I was also high as shit and pretty sure I dedicated half the page to the animation but still.
I just borrowed porn from my middle aged mother. This is what desperate looks like.
I feel awkward having to tell people “sorry you can’t finger me because I will get a UTI and I don’t have health insurance”
I a very close black and white picture of my slightly erect penis and I blew it up put it in an art gallery for a show coming up and somebody bought it for 30 Grand!!!
Randomize
