just do it
fine only cuz shes asian
I just want to sing "highway to the danger zone" when I'm taking his pants off.
to do: lose virginity to hamster dance
I assumed she put out when I heard her friend call her "dickbutt"
can you pick me up an extra syllabus
i passed out in the shower again
You walked in with a firecracker and a doughnut then demonstrated what a lazy job he did fucking you
do not get into a discussion with my roommate when im sitting there naked ever again.
He just sent me a picture of me icing a cake with a butcher knife topless.
You and Eric are like slutty bowling balls, and that poor family are the pins. They won't know what hit em.
strike, motherfucker.
My cab driver has a hooker in the front seat. Really, this is serious. And weird.
Hey I came back and we made joints with the breathalyzers the cops left last night.
I round house kicked her emotions in the face
Hey douche face I just want you to know, if you ever got hit by a bus, I'd really miss you.
Only if you died obviously.
I think we should have a sex position advent calendar
I hear my roommate snoring and I feel bad for his girlfriend but then I hear them having sex and I guess it all works out in the end.
Randomize
