Will you take my knitting needle, stick it far up my nose, reach in my frontal lobe and give it a few swirls?
I just woke up and found a naked man on my floor. Looks like Dad had a wild night of strip poker
I just tried to pick my 105-lb puppy up and accidentally fingered its asshole
There are some things we keep to ourselves Brian
So I don't think its herpes anymore. Could be a sign of diabetes though. Is it bad that I consider getting diabetes 'dodging a bullet'?
Slut skills are useful in every country.
She just asked me if her C-section scar turned me on.
Theres an amvulance here. It might be for me
It is completely possible to eat beef jerky sexually.
I can control the tv with my phone while pooping on the second floor. I thought you should know for future reference
My dick looks like crazy bread
pics are now mandatory
Hey I didn't mean to be all lemme get with your ex husband.
Do you have a moment to talk about our lord and savior, Kendra's boobs?
You know I base where I go on the likelihood of me getting laid there. This includes work.
long story short... we may or may not have lost your car.
Obviously you're feeling a little sexually frustrated.
I consider humping a stranger every ten minutes when I walk in the street.
Randomize
