You were right, I'm so drunk and I want to eat the shit out of my vanilla cupcake candle it smells delish
Experience is the best teacher
I'm jealous of your bromance
Just got super judged by a walmart cashier for buying diet pills and candy in the same transaction. Like she has her life figured out.
Yeah kinda weird. My grandparents are here for dinner and I'm chilling on the couch close to tripping out on pain killers. My pap asked me how works going and I prettymuch drooled on myself as an answer.
Called the cops on a high school party then went in after all the kids ran away and took the rest of the beer. What are you doing tonight?
If I believed in "responsibility" and "having limits", I would probably say I consumed too much alcohol in the last 48 hours
his face was nice enough, but his choice of footwear screamed columbian drug lord
Just puked off the 5th floor onto a car windshield. This is my life and I'm proud of it.
there is a video of me on Facebook getting mad at a trash bin what the fuck was in your Pepsi
Already at the river; already getting fucked up. And yes that semicolon is legit because those are congruent statemests
Oh yea... In other news I've decided to get an external hard drive and start getting music from all the guys I'm fucking... Do you think a terabyte would be enough storage space?
its 2pm. u awake yet?
ill text u back later. still peeling fingernail polish off my face.
my cat just photo bombed my nudie.. does this qualify me as a cat lady?
I've come to realize that I need a break from life when I just tried to use my address numbers as the cook time on the microwave
Something tells me tonight will end with me wearing my pants on my head again.
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