just won 30 on black! Ok adicteddd! Never coming back gqmbeqing is easy.
now my debit card is betting 1k whoops. im gongk eh be rich!!!
whoops didnt work. think the gambeli mashine is busters!! now im betting 2k?! bad idea?
the next pure michigan commercial i see, i am going to pee in a fucking lake
I woke up this morning under my fitted sheet and my legs through the sleeves of my sweater.
guy picked up a cops taser, thing shot him in the neck, he went down and pissed himself, cop started laughing and hasnt called an ambulance.
BEES IN MY FUCKING PANTS. HELP.
I just caught Brandon licking the fake chocolate on a smores ornament
I made him go down on me for 40 mins then pretended to pass out. I swear, I'm like a boy.
dont call me baby and dont touch my ears. ITS ALL I ASK
I'm obsessing over hocus pocus right now. What if I change my Grindr profile to "come little children, I'll take thee away to a land of enchantment"
Is it bad to have a craving for speed? I feel like my nose is thirsty.
Regret, thy taste is box wine.
When God was sprinkling self control to everybody, he ran out and was like ehhhh she'll make it!
also I can check "jump into a moving car" off my bucket list if that tells you how tonight is going
A guy caught me talking to a sock today in the Laundry room if it makes you feel any better
Sadly that does. Why...where you talking to a sock
Bc I didn't know him and I asked him where he came from and why he was hanging out with my thongs
No way man ... This is real life. Complete sentences and everything.
Randomize
