All i remember was he was wearing billibong pants... well actually my mom found that out for me.
At least he's not married... I hate Halloween hookups
I just pulled a piece of cookie out of my bra in the middle of class. I'm forever alone.
Yes stubble LOOKS hot but factor in his shitty bj skills and I might as well have jacked off with apricot scrub
Walk of shame. Stopped at an estate sale on the way back to the house. Old lady pulled a condom wrapper of the back of my hoodie. beat that
8===D
That's the bat signal to come over and fuck me.
Thanks for the hickies, asshole. I make my living as a fitness instructor. It's gonna look reeeeeeal weird if I have to wear a scarf while teaching Zumba all week.
exhale infront of a fan. self shotgun.
The paramedics said she just kept whispering "I just wanted to party"
I told my mom I'm great in bed. That is quality mother daughter bonding.
If I spent my amateur stripper money does that mean I am cleansed of my sins?
Going to the ER, I'll explain later but apparently drunk me isn't allergic to peanut butter.
I cant go through life without knowing what ginger pubes actually look like
Is there evidence of another human being getting away with this/ not dying?
I was just dry heaving outside of the Chem building when a guided tour walked by. Welcome to the Maritimes kids...
Randomize
