I see an opportunity for you to use your nakedness to cure my boredom.
Oh no. He has the "I'm 30 years old and I just shit myself in public" face.
Is it standard protocol to defriend someone after they give you chlamydia?
you wouldn't come out from under your bed because you said there were six-armed bears everywhere.
ohhh that explains the pepperonis I found in my sock drawer this morning...
no it doesn't.
we literally spent four hours convincing you that all 5 of your toes were there. no more everclear on a tuesday.
You distracted them by dancing on the stripper pole, I ripped the flag off the wall, stuffed it in my pants and we were out.
So I am guessing last night was a success we are all accounted for and only 3 of us have hospital bracelets on
I just pulled a piece of cookie out of my bra in the middle of class. I'm forever alone.
His balls looked like two miss shaped chicken nuggets
I just creeped on air mattress guy's facebook and discovered his ex is the trifecta of evil: tiny, cute, and blonde.
Just smoked pot with a guy who has apparently been living in the woods for over a month. He just walked out of the woods. This is not real life.
So did he inherit the massive family cock?
:(
If I die, let him know that his penis was the last penis I saw. And I'm happy about that.
Is being in jail an excusable absence?
He's not very smart so he didn't know I was yelling at him with monologues from Scandal.
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