READY
for what?
TO HAVE SEXXXX
i think you have the wrong number
i dont know whats so great about being respectable.
Yes, that was ME getting carried out of the club singing 'i believe i can fly'
You kept me hostage in your driveway until you got your point across that alaska has warm weather
Exactly. Stay back and unsubscribe from her
Would you like to partake in getting high as fuck with your best friend and then proceeding to cry over the shit head guys we deal with?
She said she's different now I guess anytime you get a bible tatt it automatically cancels out all the whoring you did for 10 years
I can control the tv with my phone while pooping on the second floor. I thought you should know for future reference
Why did I wake up to a snap chat of myself drinking beer out of a blender?
Who looks around on a bright, sunny day and says, "you know what? Today I'm going to write gay dinosaur erotica"
OH GOOD GOD THE BUFFALO WING SAUCE IS BURNING MY FUCKING CUNT. WHY THE FUCK DID I AGREE TO SPICY AND NOT MILD
i just used a selfie stick to take an ass pic. i hate myself.
So TMI but just realizing I have not masturbated since trump took office. He's sucked the sex drive out of me.
Quick question, did I crash teeth with you when I snogged you, or did I headbutt something between the car and the bed last night?
I have blood and BBQ sauce all over my shirt. I blame you for the blood.
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