that's just what I need...drunk ass people throwin hatchets in the dark.
i just fucked the bartender on my cruise to get free alcohol. have things gone too far?
You put a nerf gun to his head and demanded him to take you to taco bell..
Best part: she drunkenly told me I'm dangerous then slurred to my parents that I should watch out in case I fall in love with her. Then she mounted a pinata
They wear helmets and mouth pieces when they drink...u down?
How many vodka infused gummi bears count as 1 drink?
Bloody Mary Monday just took a turn for the worst... Just had a heart to heart talk with the cat about it's obsession with chewing on cardboard.... Time for a nap.
My parents called me out on catching us walking home from the bar in a swimming motion because "it was too windy to walk" home...
just woke up under a car ? That's odd
Holy fucking shit
WAIT BUT IM WEARING A BACKPACK THAT MAGICALLY HAS 30 BEERS IN IT
All I've succeeded in doing since I saw you is drool on my shoulder
He came over and said its legs day so put them in the air! Fucked me for 30 minutes and said he had dinner reservations to go to. Well i just ran into him and his friends hammered at Taco Bell
Make sure you plan your visit for October. That's ACL festival, it's like every Bro in the country converges on Austin. My vagina wants to go hunting.
The notary thing was a good idea. I can charge $2 per signature. I'm currently being paid in beer.
he just fucked me for my cheese..
I am at a cat party and I just witnessed people lapping vodka out of a bowl for a contest. Lol
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