Sex on bubble wrap = best decision ever.
I listened to the last 10 minutes of that 20 minute voicemail, it's solid gold. At one point he literally suggests we buy tasers and go around shooting people.
Me and a lesbian played "may the best man win" over a bi chick tonight... I lost, still fun though
This needs to stop. I just vacuumed the wall. Adderall is a double edged sword.
drunk doesnt even begin to explain it. he said he was going to get playing cards from the lobby and came back 20 minutes later with a full set of sheets.
Needless to say they were not happy to find out that we braided their hair together, when one of them woke up needing to puke bad
he told me to hold it and try to write my name in the snow and it seemed like a bonding moment because neither one of us had ever done that before. i didn't anticipate it vibrating and weirding me out therefore making me let go and get my hand peed on.
Is it bad to have a craving for speed? I feel like my nose is thirsty.
I thought he put a fake swan in my yard, but no, he put a real life swan in my yard
smoked some of that legal weed last night, felt like God himself legit bent me over his knee and spanked my ass. Never again..never.
Even blacked out me knows not to sleep with socks on
I know he’s a bad decision but he's casual, his penis is amazing and his technique is on point.
He got me off while watching hockey. He's a keeper.
The first thing my Christmas gift money is buying is a dildo.
I got so pissed i stormed off and threw his burrito on his windshield
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