But do you think a lot of ppl use facebook as a masturbation supplement to porn?
Let me make clear that I am not a facebook masturbator
Countdown til Saturday. I'd assume we're somewhere around 10,000 bottles of beer on the wall.
I think I'm cybering, it's been a while and its more in depth than it was in 8Th grade.
IT'S FRIDAY. So quit being a pussy, get out of bed, and come help me drink these 40s. That's not a request.
Are you available to help carry me into the house Monday?
He's either jacking off or listening to Kanye West.
every Thursday i draw one of my friends names out of a hat to choose who i will drunkenly text all weekend
She wanted me to watch her masterbate and after she thanked me for a wonderful evening and left. This state is weird.
I'm two guys short from fucking the whole baseball team and one is gay. I will be successful by the end of this month.
Yes she scared me. She had NIPPLE CLAMPS ATTACHED TO A STUN GUN.
As a gentleman, I asked her if she was sure and she just whispered "wreck me" in my ear. I took that as a green light.
But now he's gone and I'm exhausted and my vagina is yelling at me and I want a cheeseburger
I just heard your voicemail. Glad you like my dick and think I'm cool
Also I'd apologize for texting you flipping my shit about the science of hair growth while I was shrooming last night but we know each other better than that
Matt is trying to convince me that we have a deal where if I show him my tits he won't do cocaine. Apparently we shook hands on it?
Randomize
