i just wish he would text me so i could ignore his text and show him how little i care anymore
i knew she was high when she broke up the cookies into her glass of milk and ate it like cereal
Yeah not really sure what I said but I remember "douchebag" and "fuck your own face"
To a 70 year old lady?!
She should get an extra 30 days for that Georgia Rule movie......terrible.
my wrists were so small for the handcuffs, i could slip them off and hand the tow truck driver my keys....
So. Much. Sex. I feel like i ran a marathon then someone kicked me in the vagina. Soo worth it
and ive been naked for the greater part of the evening. alone, drunk, and naked. i think that is how all great interventions start.
I'm going out with a guy whose nickname is Shark Week cause he'll eat anyone. I'm very excited.
At the start of the night I was all 'come at me universe' and three hours later I was ordering an extra large pizza in bed in the dress I had gone out in. Well played universe.
I wonder how he feels knowing that he's the one who turned me gay
Our sibling relationship has really blossomed into a wonderful mutual acceptance of sluttyness
He couldn't give me an orgasm, but he did give me a UTI.
I haven't gotten dressed in 4 days. God bless you, unemployment.
I hate csi yet I find myself watching a full marathon. I am also eating hotdog buns stuffed with barbecue chips and they are quite tasty
She tied me to her bed using her honor chords. Thank god for graduation!
Randomize