it's just weird having a massive boner in the morning when you could have used it the night before.
theres no cameras in the kitchen right? cause i dont wana get fired for peeing in the kitchen in a cup
i love that when i tell my kids and grandkids about how we first met it will be about this little thing called a "poke" on facebook
He's crying and calling me out on using him. It's awful. And I'm too drunk to leave.
I'm not drinking anymore...and by that, I mean until St. Patrick's Day.
He is into some weird shit i walked in his room last night he was waving his hard dick around hitting shit yellin cock fight
the other day i was so high i found pages and pages of pictures of HD hamburgers and patriotic music. bong rips for merica.
My house smells like bleach. Also, I do not feel bad about all the stuff I stole from the hospital while I was there.
It will be like a scavenger hunt.. only we're looking for places to have sex.
she's fucked both of my roommates but not me. i feel like I'm not part of the group anymore
So we were in bed when his brother walks in, walks over to me, fist bumps me and says he just wanted to say hi, then leaves...so random lmao
He was stoned laying on my bed singing I'm a little tea cup while I took a pregnancy test. Thank god it was negative.
Well I didn't know she was a dominatrix...so I kind of just went with it
I'm eating shredded cheese and chugging coke, until I can function again. I'm tingling everywhere
The best part of being a lesbian? If I'm late for work at a hookup's place I can use her make up and peace out. Well and all the sex of course.
Randomize
