I'm at the psychiatrist, and this lady is crazy.. she keeps yelling about how her HMO insurance gave her breast cancer? Adderall isn't worth this.
There are bruises on the top of my foot. The pole won.
i had to sit with a fan pointed directly to my vag for a good 10 minutes
Why is there a keg in our kitchen? I'm not complaining but why is there a keg in our kitchen?
Now back to adults eating hotdogs.
WHAT THE FUCK JASON, WHY IS THERE A FREE BLOW JOBS BY LISA SIGN IN MY FRONT LAWN WITH MY PHONE NUMBER ON IT?! PEOPLE ARE PULLING INTO MY DRIVEWAY!
Well just watched a guy puke in a trash can then proceed to pick pizza outta said trash can and eat it
the cops accepted 42 wallaby way Sydney. and the cops, and cab driver accepted the new address. please tell the win i am experiencing
I'm still high with raccoon eyeliner eyes and chocolate all over my face and chest, clutching a mug of wine. Happy graduation.
I don't know why I do this to myself his dick is a constant source of disappointment.
Is banging someone in the national guard considered a state service or a national one?
I'm starting to think my emotional health is declining because I was watching transformers today and legit almost started crying
Now with the essential back story, I can empathize. Sorry about your beer and butthole.
I was at a crossroads, dude. Like, do I wanna eat chicken McNuggets or talk about my feelings?
I know this sounds fake but she's deep frying a bar of soap right now
Come fucking get her
Randomize
