All these guys look like the American Apparel version of Jesus...
why is there a picture of someone wearing Tevas with socks taped on the wall?
if socks could get pregnant i would have catholic amounts of kids
I called her a whore. 15 minutes later she gave me head at arby's while i was eating a roast beef. best afternoon ever
Then he told me I had the most beautiful looking vulva
i checked my sent messages this morning and i had apparently tried to text the bar, saying "idk what i drank, do you?"
Bring my lunch to work in liquor store bags is doing nothing for my career
Let's make a pact to never get in a cab at 3am together unless it's to go home or for pizza.
Then he said something about how from that angle I looked just like his mom.
Potato salad is not cupcake ingredient
While I faked being asleep, he literally prayed to God out loud, asking for forgiveness for losing his virginity before marriage.
Theres a midget tsa agent. Just an observation
Bro i pulled the fucking willy wonkas gold ticket of ratchets the other night this chick was a real treat god bless her
If you got me high enough to laugh at a ceiling fan until I shat my pants you should at least have the decency to buy me another pair
I BLEED THE BLOOD OF MY ANCESTORS WHO FOUGHT SO BRAVELY FOR MY FREEDOM
cool u want pads or tampons
tampons please
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