Just try to make good decisions...remember our convo we had about morals the other day?
Turn them off?
No vaginas are yucky and I don't think you're old enough to handle one yet
just found my calculator watch from 6th grade. the hipster transformation is complete
i kept telling her phones are not food, and she countinued to put it in her mouth..
so all the bums hang out by my new store, they have a leader we call king bum... He got dethroned by police today for choking out a hooker. The bum heirarchy is in shambles right now.
Count me out. I seem to have semen induced blindness in one eye.
I DON'T CARE LET'S GET DRUNK AND GO. I STRAIGHTENED MY HAIR DO THIS FOR ME.
We were eating hotdog buns dipped in French onion dip in lawn chairs at 4am. That drunk
tried doing a cartwheel after 10 beers. Guess who has a dislocated shoulder.
DOUBLE NIPPLE PIERCINGS ARE HORRIFYING
Nothing says "back to school" like walking in the first day with a hangover
I feel awful. The bartender added me on Facebook and there's chips all over the bathroom floor
He spilled some of his beer on your shoulder then proceeded to lick it off. By the face you made, I don't know if you were completely horrified or really turned on.
hypothetically, what's the best method to remove an stray semen gob from a roommate's important school document?
True college students do jello shots in the library
Randomize
