with your own penis?
Wasted at the beach. Toasting underage, overdeveloped girls. God bless 'em.
And if you don't call me, I will embarrass you publicly with a can of spray cheez.
friends don't let friends hook up with gingers.
so explain to me why i woke up in jail this morning
because you opened a jar or pickles and a bag of fritos and layed down in the middle of aisle 7 while singing 'la cucaracha'
no more ever clear
She brought up feelings... her days are numbered
You slept with a red coat way too close to independence day. It's just very unpatriotic.
He is just lying there. People are throwing money onto his chest as they walk by...
Last night I woke up and the national rep of his frat was sucking my toe.
You should make a checklist to ensure they are quality material. Here's mine: wearing shoes, not drunk, very hot, has teeth, speaks english. You never know
I shaved my legs and got a bikini wax, I don't care what I take home as long as it has a penis
I know now that the cab driver can get me a 10 dollar blow job. I'm practically a local.
I tried to be mean but not so mean that he won't bone me next weekend
I was grinding with girl while I was eating french fries, and she turned around to hook up with me. She ate my fries.
yes that’s a photo of a horny gay donkey
Oh I know. I’ve known many horny gay donkeys in my time.
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