Ryan Ross and Jon Walker left panic at the disco today.
I predict a mass suicide of the 14 year old girl population...
i guess that's what happens when you find your girlfriend at the zoo
I think I should become a real estate agent in th friend zone I know the place so well
dude,it's memorial day.not getting wasted=you're a terrorist
....I found a picture of what appears to be the underneath side of the barstool (taken from the floor) and to top that, 9 pictures of the ceiling. Also, did I mention there's a picture with us posing with a pregnant lady at the bar?! WELP
she texted me out of nowhere. and I wanted to get drunk. like I didn't even have her new number until 6 hours ago and bam we were rolling around drinking cotton candy vodka from the bottle she had stuffed in a boot
Shaving my legs with an ankle monitor on is surprisingly more difficult than the drunk driving that got me here
Is it bad that I'm tracking my period with Instagram pictures?
When I was sick she came over with Call of Duty, animal crackers and a handjob. Honor says I can't dump her until Easter
i just realized I haven't been laid all summer. So sad. What a waste of a perfectly good vagina.
And now let us go forth, and be garbage people in public.
Isn't that our default mode?
Okay so I just had a really great idea
no.
Tonight I researched being a phone sex operator and teaching English at a French school in Africa. I think my future lacks direction
He told me that after two hours of fucking he feels as though his dick wants to detach from his body and go to Mexico..
fell asleep while jerking off ln. woke up to my hand in my pants and my cat crawling all over me
Randomize
