I got wasted for the 1st time and I sat in a fridge for 2 hours and a trash can?
Of course im so fucked up sarah. I fight away tornadoes.
Should I have kids to fix a relationship??
spell your last name, im trying to find you on facebook
My grandmother just explained bulimia to me as a diet
You were asking people if they could pee on you while you shotgunned beers
once the "do it" chant starts, any shot at an even remotely dignified party experience is dead.
I knew it would get worse when I said I think your roommate is watching and he looked over at him and said ... So?
Yeah her jello shots are the next closest thing to a lethal injection. That potent.
Do you think I shall pursue this journey to the center if the dick?
Holy high batman
The hairdryer was like a fuckin obstacle course
If there's one thing I learned yesterday, it's that if I really wanted to I could be mayor of Toronto.
I love how when they see that I'm upset their initial response is to offer me ecstasy
He said he doesn't "believe" in cuddling. Can you come get me?
When I went to pick up Adam from the train station, I found him passed out, covered in gold paint and wrapped in a red blanket. someone had glued a gaudy green rhinestone to his forehead. He looked homeless.
Randomize
