i either just vomited on a lesbian or a small boy
She has HUUUUUUUGE nipples
dude i just saw the hottest 13 year old but she was kinda ghetto.
you'd be alarmed at how much plan b i just found in mom's bathroom...
Ask politely.
Fine. Can i please come over, hang out with you, sit around a campfire, smoke tree, listen to sublime, and fuck the shit out of you?
Thats good enough.
You guys need to get along, there is no need for a pissing contest...We're all fucking each others ex's.
Judging by his buldge, this guy is huge. just paid steve to follow him into the bathroom and find out. They had a convo about it.
So I vaguely remember making out with you this morning, I think you were on a date?
she kept asking for a lobster dinner while she was crying. it was actually the most reasonable drunk chick request i've ever heard.
just watched a cripple ollie in his wheelchair to get on to the elevated floor in the bar. I. LOVE. WISCONSIN
I vaguely remember taking a yard light, holding it up like the statue of liberty, and all of us at the party chanting the national anthem. What a glorious night
Getting a blow job while breaking up with my gf helps cope with the pain... Kinda weird her best friend is giving me the BJ
I told my therapist about the other night and he actually whistled and said "wow that is not good."
He was cheering for me from the end of the bar as I sloppily ate a Ruben sandwich. It made me feel really special.
Why are you naked at 4pm?
Its my birthday, I dont have to wear clothes
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