I'm looking for sex. Do you know her?
Going to bed naked. Too bad I am all alone. Need to make some changes. Either sleep with clothes or with you
You were so drunk that you were trying to take pictures of a MILF at the park so you could send them to Adam, but you didn't want to "seem creepy," so you used taking pictures of her son as a cover. Needless to say, cops were called.
He ate me out and then left in a hurry and shouted "Sorry to dine and dash" as he left my house
you ever feel like there is a sober person insided you pointing and laughing....?
So, I just sold my textbook to have money for Plan B.
We can talk tomorrow when we're both alert. My mind is somewhere else right now.
Where's it at?
In your pants.
I seriously just washed my dick in a public restroom. That's how dirty last night got
I'm the only adult here not drinking and their 2 year old daughter is trying to play dolls with me.. I've never been so demoralized in my life.
Just made nachos out of string cheese and sunchips and laying in my bed watching babay einstion..get on my level
You're not supposed to support this behaviour, btw the judge recognized me
Your first mistake was not throwing your beer at the RA and running
Two run-ins with cops/park rangers tonight and now I'm just wandering around high and shirtless
Sacramento doesn't deserve you
Because cocaine and lesbian hookups on a Tuesday cannot be the new normal
You know he wants it bad when he starts going door to door for condoms.
Randomize
