Help. Asians are flirting in front of me(773): They speak asian
Doo rag and shades in the bar. You are missing your future husband.
We were having sex on the balcony and this guy walked by, so drunkily i said "dont move, he cant see us if we dont move."
The girl I was getting head from just called my dick an anteater...I hate my parents for not cutting my cock tip off.
vicodin is the reason why I believe in magic
The parties out here are fucking awesome and I've got the grades to prove it.
The fact that I found him in his Ninja Turtles t-shirt next to six empty and obviously consumed packs of EasyMac watching reruns of Becker certainly made telling him that I wanted a divorce so much easier than I had planned.
Then I realized I was alone sitting on the bathroom floor brushing my teeth at 2am laughing to myself.
they esentially rejected my mermaid threesome offer:(
She asked what it would take for you to fuck her. You drunkenly mumbled, "pepperoni pizza" and then got in the cab by yourself. You were smiling too. It was weird.
Remember when you walked in on me sleeping INSIDE a pillowcase?
Kind of like the new iOS 10 because I can send sexts with fireworks or confetti. Really gets the point across
Naked. Naked is my favorite color.
I feel like hooking up with you on my floor, sneaking out my window and jumping a fence is an effort that deserves a happy birthday.
Is she blowing you? I'm in the closet.
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