I just encouraged Kelsey to make out with some guy for beer so I could take one, does this make me a pimp?
By definition I think it does.
So this is what it feels like to be all that is man.
He DELETED brick breaker off his blackberry why even bother trying to find something in common?
Why is there not a 'day after acid' genre. Or even a pandora station or something.
They asked if I was about to puke and my response was to laugh and suddenly throw up. Continuing my asshole streak I kept laughing while still vomiting.
Dude if our hands were ladels we could work at a soup kitchen
That would be so convenient
You were sitting in the tub, clothed, squirting my KY all over yourself. You said "it's warm." then passed out.
I'm sitting on the toilet just to avoid my bosses look of disapproval
Nothing says "welcome to Denver" like a hot 18 year old giving you directions to the dispensary and ending up blowing you in the backseat
I'm pleased to know that your mom refers to me as "the ass piliager" now
Thought about you all night last night, then I fucked the shit out of my boyfriend. Win win for me.
Yeah I don't remember how I got home last night
Judging from my pants, I embarrassed myself smh
I just got called the stable friend. This makes me super uncomfortable
WINE AND FILM. TALK ABOUT AN UPGRADE FROM NETFLIX AND CHILL.
Hey do you or anyone you know want to get drunk for free? At 4pm tonight at rctc for field sobriety training for future cops
There were 16 girls and 31 titties. That’s how the club was. Lance doesn’t get to decide ever again.
Randomize
