is it true that cum stays in you for 7 years?
that's gum
I'm still with the girl from last night. remember to call me conrad and that i work for PETA
we have a love-hate relationship...we love having sex but hate waking up next to eachother
good luck with ur interview. Just show them your confidence and don't make that sucking snot noise. Really don't. Praying for you, love mom
all i remember is stealing his cheesepuffs and shaving my vagina in the hotel lobby
you think she would figure it out that ever dude that fucks her is just doing it bc they are in a contest to bang the fattest girl
Everything was good until you pulled the bartenders hair because she cut you off
Realistically anyone can come I don't care it's Boston what do I own boston? No. I just don't want people who are gonna give me "why are you doing that" kinda look when I take birthday shots out of my birthday babe shot glass necklace.
Why do you need me to cover for work?
I wouldn't say NEED but lets just say I smell like guacamole and semen.
I would seriously fuck her so hard, her contacts would pop out of her eyes.
The cop let me finish my J before he cuffed me. Coolest arresting officer ever.
Are you awake? Because I would like to know whether or not I should refrain from giving my evil laugh when I enter the apartment...
He'll only communicate through snapchat with pictures of him holding his cat or his dick. Bit of Russian roulette opening them in public but I did it anyway.
Santa tracker drinking game, you in or what?
It was like sex on an active volcano surrounded by the night sky and bloodhounds. And by that I mean it was nice.
Randomize
