I like how you formally end text interactions, just turn your phone off or don't respond you pervert
is it bad that i regret hanging out with a girl tonight because that means i have less time to sit on youtube watching xmen cartoons?
a guy from my religion class just walked in with a red cup. hello first friday of 2nd semester.
Of course he got arrested. He was wearing a toga. Even Tom Hanks couldn't act sober in a toga.
why the fuck would he compare you to sexy aquatic creatures?
Hes laying on the floorn in the bathroom telling Jesus to raise the flag
She literally pulled the door off the hinges and "dropped" it down the stairs... Do I just say 'good job' and put her to sleep?
sriracha body shots, that's gonna be a thing
it's like you just said "i want you to suffer"
Got done with class, now I'm buying MD 2020 with the ex. Sure feels like college.
He would come to class in wrapped in nothing but a pink towel
Last night apparently I said "I need a break" and then I just passed the fuck out for 3 hours
I am so sorry for drunk texting you r kelly lyrics
Are you 5:30 blackout again?
You ran into the tattoo shop screaming PIERCE MY TITIES
right after that u started calling me g-force and started trying to bellyslide down his drive way
Randomize
