I cant even remember his name or what he looked like. all I remember is what the tattoo on his forearm looked like.
well, he kindof looked like a walmart greeter. I tried to stop you
it would be nice to just get drunk, not hook up with anyone, and not die this weekend
The twins are whispering in turkish together. I think I did something bad last night.
Dude..this is the third year in a row me and him have fucked at a super bowl party..does that count as a tradition?
Okay. I am working on pulling a tooth out of my mouth. Call me.
CONGRATULATIONS! You have won: pictures of my nipples!
I have a present for you
Like a legit gift, not just me showing up and getting naked
Thanksgiving day drinking ended up with me in a shopping cart screaming where are the bitches and condoms. I'd say it went well.
I was in a competition with shots tonight...shots won.
Just test drove the kilt for Justin's wedding. NEVER. WEARING. PANTS. AGAIN.
Well if YOU HAVE TO KNOW, we're laying across the street from the bar on that grassy hill trying to see who's she's with at the bar.
OKAY THAT'S CREEPY AND I'D PROBABLY ACCIDENTLY ORGASM
By 9 pm this evening I'll have accomplished smashing with two different guys in two different time zones in the same day.
Stay hydrated
And you hate the library
Yea but I love drugs and my grades
It’s a 10 inch dick! Of course I’m getting a Brazilian
Randomize
