she had the hairiest bush ive ever seen. it looked like a spoiled head of lettuce.
She was walking with the authority that 2 beers gave to a light weight.
I'm half bulimic - I binge but forget to purge
she likes to give head while listening to britney spears, getting blown by a girl with headphones on is a nice level of separation
karaoke mosh pit has descended into fisticuffs, send backup
I couldn't sleep so I took 4 shots of vodka and promptly threw up in the sink. Happy Thursday
My parents got me a bottle of vodka and a puke bucket for christmas. I've already used both.
We hooked up with 2 friends last night as always and she stole their fucking cocaine and I just had to drive to their house and make her give it back to him hahshshahahah only me
This dude has batman tighty whities on over his cargo pants and he has the nerve to yell "fuck you bitch" up at my window.
Pretty sure at some point last night i said to myself "it'll be fun to completely lose my mind for a night"
I think were only still together so we can make each other miserable
I'm naked on my couch and just ate a chip that was in my belly button.. my 20s have been weird.
See I insist I'm not a groupie and then I say things like "will bang for a backstage pass".
I dropped a piece of Mac and cheese in the shower and I almost still ate it. Stoned, but not stoned enough to degrade myself.
Its nights like last night that make me want to high five my liver.
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