Kelly, is this rhetorical, or sarcastic? You are very kind & quite beautiful, but we never really evolved into anything & your prevailing ambivalence spoke more than words ever could.
"We" really do not exist-if we ever did. Both of us may have been hoping for more than was possible.
I would enjoy sitting down to talk about the dissolution, but think it may end up being counter productive.
Nah got too drunk to function...probably could have dragged something home over my shoulder if the cops didn't roll
yeah but I shoulda known it\'d be bad when he start rubbing my pubic bone instead of the clit! Awkkkkwarddd
your youtube search consisted of "food slideshow" and "the angry beavers"
She solidified the fact that the icon from Wendy's is the only ginger I care for
To make up for the snow days we missed he's making us write a paper on alcoholism. It's like he knows.
I took a shit in your bathtub. Nothings off limits
He came over while I was in the ER and hung pictures of himself around my house.
She is a social worker. An actual good person trying to save the world. I feel like every time I give her an orgasm God wipes a little smudge off of my shit list.
Most awkward car ride ever. Kid in the front seat was bawling, 2 in the backseat were ready to fight, and I was giving the last kid a handie. This needs to stop happening to us.
Sitting on an airplane reeking of booze, sex and shame while surrounded by families coming home from Disney. This is not one of my finer moments.
Well at least you learned that cops don't like when you call them frenchy. Nice dive over the fence by the way.
So you are wearing a heart monitor while drinking?
Yea, they said carry on with my everyday activity.
woke up to a case of keystone on my porch when I went to bed at seven that morning.. I think it's someone's peace offering for getting my roommates car towed
Ehh, the third backed out. Two still isn't bad. Who gets a bootycall to pick them up from a bootycall's house anyways? Only me.
Randomize