Black lace...the rest is up to ur imagination
Cops are here now. U need to come back. Ur not under arrest. But u need to apologize to the woman for what you did to her cat.
mark tries to be a total badass to make up for the fact that he's a poor man's pete wentz
We owe the rent and you're unemployed...you're in no financial position to flirt with cocaine addiction.
the guy next to me needed a pen, so I let him take one from my book bag. my panties are now being passed around the class...thank you for telling me you hid them in my bookbag.
just took my birth control pill with a shamrock shake. happy st. patrick's day
Just accidentally pinched my dick between two 50 pound dumbbells while doing shoulder shrugs. God hates me.
I'm so proud of us for fucking the same friend group before we met in a completely unrelated instance.
He's only a freshman and he needs to expirence shit like that..
YOU would be the Freshman Expirence
Bro, she used the potato bongs to make French fries after. She's deff a keeper.
He wasn't excited for the fifty shades of grey trailer, so I told him we're done
She climbed up the stairs with three brownies in one fist, two in the other, and one in her mouth. Also, she opened the bedroom door with her foot. I may be in love.
I sent my roommate a text from MY phone that said, "I don't know where my phone is." Must've been a good night.
fyi my negative pregnancy test is taped to the fridge...i'll take it over an A+ any day. be proud.
What did you do with the dog when you went into the club?
coat checked
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