I'm almost 25, which means I can ride with girls that have permits
babies were throwing up all over the place
Who did Billy Mays play for?
"Shots" has been nominated for a grammy. Now all of the US has sunken to our level...
Just ran interference for her again. Sometimes i wonder how many times in my life i'll have to be a cock block at the clinic
It's like being the dunk pilot of a plane full of pornstars and drunkenness.
I'm playing a game where i judge myself by whats in my cart. Also have 3 bright red giant buckets
one night of dollar margs at dinner and dollar beers at the bar later, i am throwing up in his shower and gurgling soap and water to kill the taste of sin in my mouth. dollar days need to stop endng like this.
My middle name is suave and my vagina shoots rainbows, what else would you expect?
You can't text people with drinkers' regret at 8 in the morning. It's just bad form.
Guess I was throwing darts at a patrons head last night, lol! Black out
Well we were going to compare notes, but all I could remember was throwing up, and all she could remember was kissing, so then we decided to not compare anything.
Star Trek does not adequately answer all the questions that I have about alien genitals
Dear God, please let me get my period. And if this one is fiercer than usual I completely understand.
I was doing karaoke to "baby got back" and apologizing for being white at the same time.
Randomize
