You supply the liquor and I'll "accidently" forget my bathing suit.
Deal!
Ever since he's come out, my facebook stalking experience has gotten uncomfortable
hapi new year, hope this year brings u happiness and lots of sexi people ;)
stop writing like that.
something isn't right. i offered to be his sex slave and he declined..
Sometimes he has weird facial hair...Basically he has a penis... that's what he's got going for him.
I just met his other fuck buddy...I am thinking of befriending her just to fuck with him...manuplating my roommates into hating each other is boring me i need something else to do
Just beat off to internet porn while talking to my mom on the phone and eating a cinnamon roll. U have 5 minutes to get on my level
Hospital. He tried giving some kid a stone cold stunner during a real fight.
what do i owe you?
$237.46 to be exact.
if im having that much fun on the weekend i better start remembering it.
Please, by all means, tell me what can't be helped by two stiff drinks & a blowjob?
How do you forget making out with a coworker in the dressing room at Sears on more than one occasion?
...object impermanence?
It was inevitable. It was like I was a caterpillar and now I'm a drunk and high butterfly
I am literally this close to screaming out my window if anyone nearby was down to fuck. I am too damn horny.
THERE IS A BABY THAT ISN'T MINE THAT'S GOING TO HEAR ME BEING SEXED!
The abomination is in progress. At least one barista side eyed me and the other has fear in her eyes
Randomize