I like how she turned her beer into a wet t-shirt contest
I've been emailing with a woman. I don't think she's into me, but we've become sorta email buddies. I'm hoping to meet her because on her profile she states she's into 'fisting.' Frankly the thought kinda freaks me out but I'm dying to see what kind of woman is 1) into that and 2) admits it upfront.
Before he took my jeans off all he said was "no hard feelings from middle school right?"
It's really awkward/depressing when you are wearing heels larger than his dick
Banging bitches in a bar bathroom is not legit as it was in college, there are no fistpumps afterward only shame
It was like being fucked by the god of thunder, he gained power from the storm. I took a Plan B because I don't think regular birth control will stop Thor's sperm.
You raged at the rock climbing place for not selling beer and then just said "fuck it" and pulled out a flask.
Nah I've been there. The worst you'll see is some hobo peeing in a sewer at 3 am on a Saturday
too bad I'd hit a car before I'd hit a bush.
Are we talking about jumping from windows or your willingness to fuck a car instead of a woman?
He's a 30 yr old man who voluntarily goes by Stevie and his job title is "Jumbotron Operator". There's a 97.5% chance he lives in his mom's basement. STOP THIS NOW!!!
Who the fuck hid 3 Zimas under my pillow?! Icing doesn't count when it's 8am the next morning and everyone's left and you've passed out on your couch. Currently chugging 2 of 3...
That awkward moment when you hear your boss yelling during sex while you're on her couch eating Easy Mac.
I just dropped a chicken nugget on the floor and seriously prayed that it would be ok....I think this job is making me crazy.
Hahaha. I'm so high, this is gonna be so intense. Even the DVD menu scared the shit out of me.
I’m appalled by how severely I lower my standards when I’m horny & impaired
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