well, if it gives you any insight into how crazy it was, i am currently wikipediaing "anullment"
I'm not really sure how I got home, but judging by this headache, i'm assuming it involved bourbon.
I had to have the lights off to hide my face. I was laughing so hard I almost peed in her mouth
He asked me if we could throw a lingerie party together so I guess he's single again
I can't wait to hear about your drunken cab ride to planned parenthood at 2pm
Its not low standards. We're more of like a self esteem camp for average girls
just found out they live across the street from coke dealers... rethinking the new years resolution
This will never work out with him unless I somehow learn how to unhinge my jaw like a python.
Breakfast Clubbing as Juggalos. I can feel our IQs in freefall.
Puke, feathers, beads, and solo cups all on my way to class. I'm surprised anyone's alive after this weekend.
A stripper just invited me to her daughter's birthday. Where did my life go wrong?
he was like "can i get a kiss" and i was like "can i get a taco"
Look,the guy had sex w/a Canadian prison guard on the deck of a cruise ship,he could blow any second.
Of course the sales lady was judging you, you bought a pregnancy test, ky jelly, diet pills and a 6 pack of red bull. Even i'm judging you.
She left a cookie cake on my porch, and the frosting reads "I'm sorry". She left me an I'm-sorry-for-punching-you-in-the-face cake.
Randomize