he was fingering me to the beat of a lady gaga song. new high? new low? i don know, but i came, so whatever.
Its already bleeding so dont be alarmed after you bite it
You're the only chick there. That's not an orgy, that's called a gang bang...
I managed to throw up 90 feet under water, just removed my breathing tube, puked, put it back in. All inclusive is the way to go.
It's when I'm in my pajamas and in need of a gin delivery that I miss NYC most of all.
You need to tell your booty call to take some sudafed or something. I swear I thought you were humping Kermit the frog last night
josh has a chalupa in his pocket if you're hungry.
I'm riding shot gun after Shawn took a dump in a happy meal box because we were making record time.
I just used a baby fork as a roach clip. I am totally the cool aunt.
The woman that sang I Touch Myself died today. There's only one appropriate way to honor her memory.
I'm on the job.
I kept on yelling at him to get his shit together as he was puking
" my drug dealer just stopped by and did an elmo impression for my 2 year old nephew."
I already tell everyone in my office my bf is at the Naval academy. It slipped one time and I can't go back on it now
So my new thing apparently is getting wasted, showing people my slytherin socks and convincing them I'm slytherin..because why not
Can you face time me. I need to know if this pill is xanex or ecstasy
Randomize
