i was so high that i was eating crumbs of my bed only to realize they were fuzz thingies. fml.
The problem with having your drunkeness documented at a wedding is not only does it show up all over facebook, but all over professional photography websites.
Do 'mystery' cracked ribs heal any quicker than regular ones?
we are currently watching a singalong porn...just thought you should know
When hitting a Woodchuck bottle with a machete, glass will fly back and cut your face.
I hope you did not try this.
He sent me a Microsoft outlook meeting request to blow him in the storage room at work. I had to accept.
Last time i was there we saw the window of the pizza place we were at get busted, we were pulled out of a taxi to be questioned by the cops, and we peed outside a waffle house. I'm in.
You might call them booze related cuts, I call it "partying so hard you sweat blood"
The airport has the best people watching and munches... It should be a destination drinking location
WAKE UP!!! We have 20 minutes to get to class. That means we only have 10 minutes to get drunk.
Well I'm going to hell. But I'm going after multiple orgasms.
We go out, we get drunk, we watch Star Wars, we pass out. What's wrong with this tradition?
So stoned that I pressed the unlock button on my car keys to walk into my bedroom...
On a side note. I slept with a stuffed giraffe last night. Found it in my bed when I came home and snuggled with it. Drunk me reverted to being 2
Omg. I checked my purse this morning and I'm pretty sure drunk me stole a frat guys tube of crest 3d white toothpaste. Like that's pretty fucked up but I think if I knew someone did that to me I'd probably still invite them over again cuz I'd be like, "this girl's creative, and has good hygiene."
Randomize
