So i looked up from her cooch and there was her ex-boyfriend
Awkward
No. You are not the Kate in this relationship. I will do what I want.
theres always time to masturbate. my grandpa taught me that.
you tried to pee on a squirrel and everyone saw. you've got some serious untagging to do
he just asked if we wanted to go to an arts and crats club with him tomorrow. every day it becomes harder for me to defend his sexuality
A girl just told me she printed out my pictures and taped them on her wall. I have to stop sleeping with virgins.
HOW DID YOU GET DEPORTED FROM THE BAHAMAS
Alright, deal. Settling two drug deals before noon is what I call a productive day. I'm not even gonna go to math, I've practiced enough numbers for the day.
I think you would be disgusted with me if you knew how many times I had imaginary sex with you today
I think it's god's punishment for my behavior in Vegas . Lies were told. Angels were defiled. Pools were pissed in
Despite popular belief cocaine is not a good pre-workout
I still hate everything and everyone around me. Krampus taught me nothing.
I shouldn't have watched rise of the planet of the apes and then gotten high. I'm now convinced that the cats are out to get me.
Okay, but that still doesn't explain all the glitter in my puke.
So if my boyfriend and I hooked up with the same girl it’s not like I cheated. It’s communal.
Randomize
