It's weekends like this that make it obvious why we have to pay to come to college.
before tonight, i was terrified of what tequila would make me do. but all it did was make me hook up with a movie star. sooo basically tequila's my new fave
I woke up face down on my laptop with three windows open: itunes, chat roulette and redtube
I tried calming him down but his eyes are rolling to the back of his head and he's yelling "COMA WEED!"
We're playing a drinking game to 'how to train your dragon'. has it really come to this?
I'm genuinely dissapointed that we didn't make any fat chicks cry
I feel as though the word "tired" has become synonymous with "too high to manage the stairs" lately
He came out in cowboy boots and underpants holding a beer while he hugged my mom. I love Montana.
Its ok. I handled the situation with grace and class. lol jk i got shitfaced and fucked his roomate.
New low, passed out while taking a shit for an hour with my parents home, suprised they didnt notice
The pastor just stopped the sermon to lay hands on me. THAT hungover.
Everyone should know the rule that if your dicks touch during a threeway you just make lightsaber noises and move on.
So I don't know, I'm not a doctor, but I might be juggling dates with 3 different guys...
Whip out the absinthe and the taquitos, this motherfucker just passed the bar.
BTW, Julia referred to you as a power bottom. Are you available?
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