when I scratched it gently some sort of watery looking stuff came out...so then I just stopped thinknig about it.
Nothing gets me like the O.C. theme song does.
There's a Cowboys game and a Rangers game on at the same time...talk about Sophie's choice
Is it a bad that I spent my 5 year anniversary with my husband texting my ex boyfriend?
Well if I fail my finals for being drunk on Cinco De Mayo there is always next year to graduate.
You said that last year...
So two questions...why am I covered in muffins and are there pictures of this.
Go big or go home. i snuck in two beers in my bra. im here to win.
so my mom thinks I'm picking you up just to go buy you liquor before you go back to school tomorrow...
I'm ashamed that your mom thinks I haven't already taken care of that.
We called dibs on each other's genitals. That bond is unbreakable.
You guys had reggaeton music playing while dry humping? Definition of romance.
Just looked for hours for the remote. Found it in my purse. I need to drink less.
i may or may not have bought a plane ticket for a russian cam girl to fly here. also, can you spot me $300 on rent?
Just remember, it's never too late to make a porno
What happened last night?
Lets just say you asked me a couple times if you had eyeballs..
I told him. He hasn't said anything. Crying and holding cats is probably what is happening.
Randomize
