You can bone my sister, but I will end our friendship if you write 'LOLERS' one more time at the end of your texts.
You're the end to all my bad dreams.
Did you have that reoccuring dream about me banging your mom again?
And Anthony pissed on himself at the strip club
the girl next to me in class is drinking a margarita out of a slurpee cup. i know your going to ask how i know its a margarita and the answer is i can smell the tequila. i never want to leave this place
i feel like you're just hanging onto the edge of functioning wino.
you both peed in the photobooth after the pictures were taken.
I don't even know why im sitting in this office eating a poptart.
dude what did you give her she's eating her pocket lint
just had Stella and stale goldfish for breakfast under the watchful eyes of an inflatable cactus and 5 llama pinatas. Cinco de mayo success!
I don't know if I want to live in a world where i can't fuck an exes brother.
That's awesome and prob the first time you had an idea of what to do. I'm super proud of you Chelz
Its cos im stoned ! My high self is maturing
I can't find a song to express how gay I'm feeling.
it's like that moment that you're driving and realize you're lost except instead of driving i'm just sitting here in my living room drunk, eating a plate of sausages, drinking red wine and just thinking "i'm going to be 28 this year. i know people who are married, with beautiful and well behaved children. where was the wrong turn?"
Before he left he told me if his girlfriend ever finds out, she'll take us both to an alley and kill us.
Slept at my ex's best friends house while my ex was locked out and I walked by him sleeping in his car this am
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