Sarah, plain, and tall I adore you
is it really this hard to find a guy i can fuck and have a good time with who doesn't ask where things are going btwn us?
you sound like my dream girl
i found a dude playing guitar on the portapotty
is wine microwaveable?
so id say it was a successful trip...i only got hit on by one cousin...
You tried to tell her that the salad was an afrodisiac then proceeded to stroke yourself with the feather duster
Quite frankly, I consider the fact that I'm NOT pregnant one of my greatest achievements and I'd like to chronicle that ongoing success. I'm going to post pictures of me at "0 weeks" once a week.
i'm in that phase where i'll swallow anything except food
I'm drinking straight vodka and railing lines of adderall while writing a paper about the nature of Jesus. It's 6:50 in the morning. College.
You should have seen the pharmacists face when I paid for my inhaler refill and a box of condoms.
Hearing them have a conversation is like listening to water buffalo have sex. Awkward and scarring.
DOUBLE NIPPLE PIERCINGS ARE HORRIFYING
The dominoes guy came back thirty mins later to ask me out. I guess he figures if I'm eating pizza alone I must have gotten dumped
I really love you gals. I'm sorry again. I'm just super protective of my poutine
You spent the entire night trying to catch pigeons and hugged a homeless guy and then gave him a pregnancy test.
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